Interview with Mr. McNugget Lovin - Don Lee Samuels

So if you've been watching television..or if you've been eaves dropping on conversations at your barbershop, you've herd about McDonald's latest national ad campaign...McNugget Loving. I was wondering if it was a video playing...maybe my cable box accidentally tuned itself to BET...because lawd knows I won't do it on purpose. Then all of he sudden the room fills with the silky smooth and unbelievably minstrel voice of Mr. McNugget himself, Don Lee Samuels. I took it upon myself to do a little research on the star in the making. He is part of the R&B group N2U which was the brain child of Chris Stokes. Yes the same man behind B2K and IMx. I have very fond memories of N2U. Along with performing at Strom Thurmonds 100th birthday party, they had the number one radio single in Orangeburg South Carolina and Sardis Mississippi with "Baby Mama Love" in 2OO5.

The jigaboo gods are truly smiling on me today because I had the honor and privilege of sitting down and chatting with Mr. Samules. Definitely one of the most interesting people I've met.

MIDIMarc: Thanks for taking time out of your day for this interview. How did the commercial opportunity come to you?

Don Lee: No my nigga, Thank you! I've been getting press from some strange places. I just made the front page of several Confederate newspapers throughout the country, but yous the first nigga that's asked to interview me..and I got love for my niggas so of course I had to do this. My career was moving real slow, and the group thing wasn't goin well...labels trippin and shit, so I went solo and signed with the Karl Korbel Kagney agency based in Opressionville GA. I told Karl that a nigga got bills, and I'll take the jobs nobody else will..oh shit that rhymed...you see my nigga ims multi talented but I digress. A week later, this was one of the jobs that popped up. Thank God for Karl...that nigga is connected like a muhfucka.

MIDIMarc: Interesting, so how did you go about creating the song for the commercial?

Don Lee: Well...I didn't have much to go off except the beat. All them niggas told me was that they needed a song about mcnuggets. I spent days trying to figure that shit out. At first I was coming up with shit like "I wanna dip yo ass into some sweet and sour sauce..like a mcnugget"...but that shit was corny. I was so stressed out that it was running my blood pressure up...made a nigga go to the doctor an eyything. The doctor was like your blood pressure is high from all the McDonalds you eat and has nothing to do with the stress..but what the fuck does he know. My last resort to meeting the song deadline was talking to my mama.....can you believe that....my muhfuckin mama!! It was cool though..cause she aint nothin but 9 years older than me...she's more like a sister to me...

MIDIMarc: Wow...I don't mean to interrupt but wow...I've herd stories about things like this but never thought that I would meet a person from the situation.

Don Lee: Its cool...me and my older brother catch folks off guard with that allllllll the time. Where was i ...oh yeah..she was like a sister to me.
shit...she used to always sneak me and older brother into the club...but anyway she had to make me think back to when she would drop us at grandmas house a leave for a few hours...I guess she was shopping for groceries....clothes...a father figure...nigga ain't no tellin..but she would always come back with McDonalds. Yeah she would bring us back a happy meal...some fries or some shit...but she always had nuggets.....I would be like
"Damn mama!!....can a nigga get some mcNugget lovin?!"
"You gotta ten piece..bitch don't be stingy!!"
Yeah...shed whoop my ass after lines like that...but the anger from back then made it possible for me to finish the song...and McDonalds and my mama not sharin her nuggets has made me the nigga I am today.

MIDIMarc: That's quite a background story. I always like to find out about the events leading up to an event. You mentioned that you eat a lot of McDonalds...what's your favorite item on the menu.

Don Lee: Aww man...they got this shit on the menu now that I call the nigga happy meal. You get a 50 piece McNugget and a gallon of sweet tea....if I'm not eating that I'm waiting on the mcrib to come back. That is the greatest fuckin sand niggggggggggggggggggggggaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.



MIDIMarc: are you oka.

Don Lee:

Can we break for a second my nigga I need to take these pills.

MIDIMarc: Its no problem homie...whenever you're ready to start back is cool with me.

We break for30 minutes and the situation changes the entire course of the interview.

Don Lee: Aiight i'm back...my bad again.

MIDIMarc: Its cool homie and as a matter of fact it makes me wonder. Does your condition hinder your career at all?

Don Lee: It can sometimes. As you can see the mcnugget lovin song isn't that long but it took me 3 weeks to record it.

MIDIMarc: whoa! What kind of plls do you take for nigga turrets?

Donlee: aww man..all I do is pop 3 ecstasy pills and its like its not even there

MIDIMarc: WHAT?!

Don Lee: hell yeah nigga...I'm rolling like a bitch right now...BITE DOWN!!

MIDIMarc: Alright..well look at the time...I thank you for the interview but I really do have to go. Good luck with everything you have going on.


Don Lee: once again thank You my nigga. I herd you got them beats...u know I'm working on the McRib song...send me some tracks to go through.

MIDIMarc: that's what's up man..i'll see what I can do.

Me and My Folks Need A Radio Show Part 4

We have a new comer to the "Show"....Ladies and Gentlemen...I present to you the crazy...the beautiful...Ligia and her Office Adventures.

My office adventures continue! Ok, let's start from the beginning. I switched companies (no more 36yr old stalker soccer mom harassing me)! Festive, right?! I know... I was elated too! Moving on! I am now with ERA Realtors. Kudos to them for employing fabulous people (meaning myself, naturally). Lovely spacious office I have too. Yes! No more freaking cubical, an actual office with a door that I can shut too. SCORE! The bathroom is conveniently located right next to my office. OMG... work is great. Almost a personal bathroom, my own office, no stalker moms, I'm feeling FABULOUS (in my homo voice).

But then tragedy struck! A foul stench attacked my nostrils ninja style and i couldn't let their kung-fu grip go and there was no escaping it. It was an unfamiliar odor. A mix of smells; if you will. It was like my own personal bubble had been infiltrated with the toxic odors of rotting placenta and cabbage....infused with the unforgettable potent smell of ever so popular 1985 Charlie perfume (found conveniently in all the finest drug stores or dollar trees in your area)! YES! In case you haven't already figured this out... I'll go ahead and write in all caps for you, so you can understand my struggles. I SHARE THE SAME VENTS AS THE BATHROOM! Thats right! My beloved large office is the f'n stinky office!

And this is how i realized it: friday afternoon i had my office door shut and was diligently ( i read the dictionary) working on my laptop. When out of no where it sounded like there was someone benching 500lbs and kinda squealing with an occasional balloon slowly letting out air. It was then that i realized i needed to put on my sherlock holmes thinking hat and investigate, double O siete style. So I slowly walk out of my office and low and behold the bathroom door was locked. So I creeped around the corner and hid behind a cubical! Swinging open the bathroom door comes this ginormous beastly looking manly woman (shera on steroids), almost running out the bathroom, with the stench of Charlie and afterbirth chasing her. I was mortified! But it was too late. Hot garbage ( the stench) had already secretly sunk its death claws into my poor nostrils. There was no escaping it! It was like I was playing hide and seek with a ghost. And it would always find me. I was corned by my worst nightmare. What was I too do? Fight an invisible beast with Lysol? I had to send a file to a client, I couldn't leave! So I did the unthinkable! HAHA..... I'm a freakin genious! I stuck two cotton balls up my nose and continued to work! Hell, all I could smell was my lotion.

Needless to say, i think H.G. melted my nose hairs off.

My Office




Office Vent



Bathroom and Vent

The Solution